In the interests of fairness, it’s only right that I draw your attention to a story pointing out the abject stupidity of my fellow countrymen, as highlighted by fakeplasticnoodles.
According to the Manchester Evening News, Camelot have been forced to withdraw a lottery scratch card in the UK, because too many people were confused by it.
To win a cash prize, players needed to scratch out a panel and reveal a lower temperature than the one featured on the card. Sadly, working out minus temperatures was too much for the gambling folk of Blighty, with Camelot being inundated with complaints from irate customers unable to fathom why -5 is actually a higher temperature than -6.
Outraged 23-year-old Tina Farrell (who admitted to not having a maths GCSE) summed up why Britain is currently suffering from a skills crisis.
"On one of my cards it said I had to find temperatures lower than -8. The numbers I uncovered were -6 and -7 so I thought I had won, and so did the woman in the shop. But when she scanned the card the machine said I hadn’t.
"I phoned Camelot and they fobbed me off with some story that -6 is higher – not lower – than -8 but I’m not having it.”
Words cannot sum up the shame that I feel right now. Although as The Special One pointed out, the inability to work out minus temperatures is almost certainly one reason that Americans decided to stick with the farenheit system in the first place.